NOT LONG AGO, I was asked to lead a funeral vigil at a local mortuary. I did not know the woman who had died or those in attendance, except the person who asked me to be there. After the liturgy, those who spoke about the decedent through tears had one lamentable thing in common: they admitted they had not seen, spoken with or done much of anything for her for quite some time.
Nothing is quite so sad as the words “too late”– the regret of confronting our failures and all the times we had the chance to love, but didn’t. There is a clear connection between that vigil experience and today’s Gospel command to love God and neighbor (Mt. 22:34-40).
A lawyer asked Jesus what is the greatest commandment. Jesus responds with the two-sided rule: love God and love your neighbor. To live this Gospel, we need to ask: What is this “love”? Who is this “neighbor”? And do we love ourselves as God loves us?
Jesus’ love command is translated into the Greek as agape. This love is not merely a feeling or an emotion. It is a selfless, intentional, sacrificial choice of the will – a way of living, far removed from the “L-U-V” of a greeting card. Agape love, seeks the well-being and highest good of another, whether God, friend or foe. Jesus commands us to love as He loves us on Calvary: with a life focused outward toward God and neighbor – heart, mind and soul (Mt. 22:37), complete and undivided. Notice that Jesus does not command us to like everyone, but to love them. We cannot honor a command about feelings, but we can choose to love. We are compelled to love all because each person is created in the image and likeness of God. Our human dignity comes from God; it cannot be taken away by the world. We are all sons and daughters of God; therefore, lovable, even when we are not necessarily likable.
Jesus causes us to make a conscious commitment to love, coupled with concrete action. He tells us to feed the hungry, clothe the naked and visit the sick – not merely to pray or feel sorry for them, but to actively love them. Good thoughts and well wishes are kind, but they are not food, clothing or companionship. As commentator Peter Kreeft notes: Love becomes the work of love.
The greatest example is Jesus dying on the Cross. We rightly focus on His pain, suffering and death, but we can lose sight of the truth that we are saved by Jesus’ laying down His life as an act of perfect, extravagant love for the Father and us. And who is our neighbor? Jesus makes clear that everyone is our neighbor – even our enemies, those who have hurt us and those who do not love us in return. As Luke writes, what credit is that if we only love those who love us (Lk. 6:32)? Jesus’ love teaching is not conceptual; it is particular. It is directed toward each person we encounter.
Society asks how much we possess, how successful or self-reliant we are. Commentator Kevin Ndege reflects that the Gospel asks a different question: how much have we learned to love? St. Paul reminds us that when everything else passes away, love remains; love is eternal (1 Cor. 13:8-13).
Returning to that funeral vigil, those family and friends discovered through death that love demands doing. It cannot be reduced to sentiment or good intentions. Charles Dickens captured this beautifully in A Christmas Carol: “Business!’ cried the Ghost…. ‘Mankind was my business. The common welfare was my business; charity, mercy, forbearance and benevolence were, all, my business!’”
So, can we get busy with the daily business of love? Can we be neighbors to our neighbors today? We love God and ourselves best when loving our neighbor better.