EVERYONE WANTED TO know their secret. She said marriage is about respect and give and take. He said remembering that each day together is a gift.
Larry and Jane Spaulding would know. As a married couple of 71 years, they became the de facto marriage longevity experts of the diocesan Jubilee of Marriage Mass, celebrated on July 26 in the Arboretum on the Christ Cathedral campus in Garden Grove.
“It’s been a good journey, but it takes work,” said the 91-year-old after Mass. “A lot of compromise, a lot of communication and you can’t take one another for granted. So many people do.”
FR. ANGELOS SEBASTIAN JOINS LARRY AND JANE SPAULDING FOLLOWING THE DIOCESAN JUBILEE OF MARRIAGE MASS CELEBRATED ON JULY 26 IN THE ARBORETUM ON THE CHRIST CATHEDRAL CAMPUS. PHOTOS BY KAYLEE TOOLE/DIOCESE OF ORANGE
In his homily, Fr. Angelos Sebastian congratulated the Spauldings for their long-lasting relationship.
The special Mass was proclaimed by the California Catholic Conference as part of the global Church’s “Pilgrims of Hope” Jubilee Year.
July 26, which was also the Feast Day of Saints Anne and Joachim, was the final event of a year-long initiative by the California bishops called Radiate Love, a movement celebrating the sacrament of marriage.
A MARRIED COUPLE EMBRACES DURING THE JULY 26 DIOCESAN JUBILEE OF MARRIAGE MASS.
Fr. Angelos, Vicar General and Moderator of the Curia of the Diocese of Orange, met the Spauldings in 2007 during his six years at St. Bonaventure parish in Huntington Beach. The couple attended Sunday Mass for 40 years there before moving to St. Anne in Seal Beach. Fr. Angelos shared stories of other successful long-time couples, including his own parents, before sharing the purpose of marriage: to get your spouse to Heaven.
“In Heaven there will be no burden,” Fr. Angelos said. “There is no cross. There is only joy. There is only love, fullness of perfection. So, help one another to reach Heaven, pray together, share your life together. I know it’s not always easy. Married life has its share of suffering … but that suffering is necessary, because that’s what grows us closer to the Lord.”
Following Mass, many of the faithful approached the Spauldings to congratulate them and learn more. One couple, Adriana and Raul Lopez, said they were feeling separated before coming to Mass, but meeting the Spauldings afterward felt like a blessing.
“It’s a blessing that we met them,” said Adriana Lopez. “It’s amazing and encouraging to see a couple like them. We have hope for the future.”
Giving out marriage advice is nothing new for the Westminster-based couple who started volunteering with a marriage ministry in the 1970s. They have continued working with betrothed couples and speaking at events. Their shared Catholic faith has had a powerful impact on their marriage.
Larry is a cradle Catholic, but Jane, 92, was Episcopalian until about 20 years into their marriage, when she converted to Catholicism. The two met on a blind date — blind for 18-year-old Larry, that was. While living in the Bay Area, a mutual friend who wanted them to meet brought 19-year-old Jane down to the mailroom, where Larry was working while going to college. Jane wanted to get a peek before she agreed to the date.
“He didn’t know anything about it,” Jane said. “He was clueless. So, I said, ‘Oh yeah, he’s cute.’”
During their first date, driving his ’48 Chevy, Larry remembered pulling up to a huge, three-story house. When Larry first saw her inside, “I thought she was an angel floating down,” Larry recalled. They watched Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis in “Jumping Jacks,” had dinner at a smorgasbord place and danced. He asked for a second date.
“The main thing that brought me back is I went to kiss her goodnight; she turned her cheek on me. I thought, ‘I’ve never had a girl do that to me,’” he said. Jane interjected: “I wouldn’t let him kiss me. My mother always told me never let a man kiss you on the first date.”
They wrote letters while he was in the Navy Reserve during the Korean War. It wasn’t serious, Jane admitted, but she also didn’t go on other dates. When he returned to the Bay Area, they picked up again and continued writing until Larry unwittingly proposed.
“I told her after a date, ‘You know, Janie, maybe someday we can get married.’ She ran home and said, ‘He proposed! He proposed!’”
Larry laughed.
“I did do that,” Jane agreed. “I figured he said the M word.”
They were married at St. Philip Neri Catholic Church in Alameda, Calif., and had four children — one boy and three girls — in five years.
Concluding the Jubilee of Marriage Mass, Fr. Angelos reminded everyone to do two things.
“If you can remain faithful to one another, remain faithful to the Lord who brought you together, then you can overcome any struggles, any challenges, any sufferings of this world,” Fr. Angelos said. “And together, you will be with the Lord one day in Heaven. Find that joy of being together and find that joy in the Lord and one another.”